There’s lots of articles appearing about kids suffering from anxiety.
Some people don’t believe it even exists. Others blame the parents because kids are told they’re great, aren’t taught to compete and then fail, thinking they’re rubbish. Let me set the record straight from my point of view.
Kids do get anxiety.
I’m coaching kids at 8 years old who are anxious. I know kids younger who suffer from it.
I don’t believe that the reason they are anxious is because they’re spoilt/praised too much. There is psychological research to show that if you praise a child’s result – such as an exam result, a painting they’ve done, or something they’ve made then they can rely on more praise to feel good about themselves. Whenever they don’t get that praise they’ll then feel low.
So, if you’re going to praise a child then praise the effort, because that’s what society is built on – trying, failing and trying again.
That way they’ll feel good about themselves for trying.
However if we lived in a world where kids were taught to compete and compare and weren’t given praise then that would make things ten times worse!!
The reason kids are anxious is because they’re already comparing themselves to others. They don’t feel like they’re good enough. We’re all focused too much on achieving and comparing. That’s why kids are anxious. They’re taught that they’re not good enough if they get a ‘B’ in Maths, if their best friend gets an ‘A’. OMG!!
What about the things they are good at?
We DO need to build our kids up, but we need to teach them that ‘failing’ is part of life and makes us stronger.
We need to let them fail LOTS in school. That way the anxiety around their ‘worth’ as a person can be tackled.
If you’ve got a child, or you’re a teenager suffering from anxiety or low self esteem then my fun books can help you.
So far, I’ve got the one for teenagers sorted and am now working on a one for kids.
I care about this SO much.