An honest look at sex for mums and teenage girls
I never would have thought that I’d be writing a blog about sex, but here goes.
I’m focusing on it because this past month I’ve realised just how much of an issue it can be for teenagers and mums. Yep, really.
First up – teenagers
- When do you start having sex?
- Who with?
- What do you feel comfortable doing?
There are so many issues to work out and if you compare yourself to others, you’ll feel like you’re the only one not doing it.
Don’t compare yourself to others, because you really don’t know what they’ve been doing. Do what’s right for you and only start when you feel ready.
Don’t put pressure on yourself, or feel pressure from anyone else to do something you’re not comfortable doing. No means no and stop means stop!
You’re good enough being you and it’s important to be confident within yourself so you know what your comfort zone is and can tell your partner in advance.
Choose the best
Sex is intimate and for women it’s highly emotional. If you can, choose the best partner you can, but don’t beat yourself up if you make a mistake. Mistakes help us know what we need in a partner next time. We’ve all had ‘sweet nothings’ whispered into our ear – it’s up to you to work out if it’s genuine or not.
To be honest, mums have the same issues as teenagers! How much do you want it? Who with? What are you comfortable doing?
It’s your relationship
Again, don’t compare yourself to other couples. You really don’t know how often they have sex. It’s your relationship, so do what’s right for you. I will point out that men do appear to need sex more than women. My clients have often said that they can go months without sex without any bother – especially those who are mums with younger kids, whereas men appear to need sex much more often or they’ll explode.
Use this fact to understand your partner’s point of view, but don’t feel pressure to have sex if you’re really not up for it. It’s meant to be enjoyable and loving.
As a busy mum sex may be quite far down on your ‘to do’ list, but you do need to switch off and enjoy yourself. It can help your confidence, it can strengthen your relationship and according to Napolean Hill (in his bestseller ‘Think and Grow Rich) it can help you become rich!
Know your body
Be comfortable with who you are. Only then can you be sure with what is comfortable for you. Even if you’ve been with your partner for a long time, you still don’t need to do anything you don’t want to. Be honest and open and be true to yourself.
You may be reading this and thinking how do I get more confidence? How do I know what’s right for me?
Easy – try my free ‘Unleash Your Superpower’ email course. Or, get in touch if you think I can help you.